Does sex make you wonder? I think most people will give an affirmative answer to this question. People who have not yet had sexual experience, even if their theoretical knowledge is gradually enriched, may be curious about what it is like to have a real sex life;
People who have just tasted the forbidden fruit will feel flustered and confused in the face of some accidents during their first sexual experience. If they leave bad memories at this time, maybe their hearts will associate sex life with unpleasant pain. equal sign;
And those who have stable partners have rich sexual experiences. When the novelty fades, intimacy and love become routine. Even if there are problems, for various reasons, they may just keep silent, or just endure it. accustomed to...
But in fact, we want to say that if there are doubts and the impact of these doubts is getting bigger and bigger, we should actively seek answers or solutions instead of letting them disrupt or affect our lives and psychology.
Judging from the messages and consultations received in the background, there are various reasons why people do not like or resist sex life, which can be classified into several categories. Today, we will first talk about common problems in sexual relations, and then provide specific solutions. Program.
Reasons for refusing sex
Sexuality plays a vital role in sex, most of the time invisible, unexplored, and indescribable. But when you face someone and at a certain moment have an urge to own or be owned by him, you may feel that sexual desire is such a simple thing.
Sexual desire is one of human instincts, and physiological factors affect the process of sexual desire and sexual behavior, psychological factors determine gender identification and sexual orientation (also affect sexual desire and sexual behavior), and social factors affect the content and behavior of sexual behavior. Way.
Physiological factors
Due to physical changes caused by illness or accident, both or one of the partners has sexual dysfunction or even lack of libido. Common problems are as follows:
①Female sexual dysfunction
Female sexual dysfunction mainly refers to the occurrence of obstacles in one or more links of the sexual response cycle or the pain related to sexual life in women. It basically includes the following four situations:
Sexual desire disorder: divided into low libido and sexual aversion. The former can be understood as a lack of desire and interest in sex, while the latter is more of a psychological fear or anxiety.
Sexual arousal disorder: specifically refers to the inability to obtain enough sexual excitement after a lot of effort and attempts, which can be divided into 3 different situations: the body is ready, but the mind does not want; the mind is ready, but the body is not in the state; Neither want nor resist.
Orgasmic disorder: Difficulty reaching orgasm, decreased orgasmic intensity, or delayed orgasm, which also causes psychological distress.
Sexual intercourse pain disorder: refers to occasional, persistent, and repeated pain during sexual life that affects the normal process (here is the sexual behavior after subjective sexual arousal, not compulsion).
② male sexual dysfunction
Premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, and body inch sperm disorders all belong to this category. Among them, the most common ones are:
Bodily dysfunction: refers to the continuous (at least 3 months) inability to achieve and maintain bodily hardness, so that a satisfactory sexual life cannot be obtained.
Premature ejaculation: refers to the fact that one's own ejaculation occurs before one's will. The condition is common, with as many as a third of men saying they have had the problem at some point.
Psychological and emotional factors
In addition to the reasons why both or one of the partners are no longer in a relationship, some people refuse to have sex because of psychological shadows or childhood trauma, such as having been sexually assaulted or having had an unpleasant experience in a previous sexual experience. It's like repeating the tragedy of the past.
social factors
Affected by the social and cultural atmosphere, when it comes to sex-related topics, most people's attitudes are more inclined to avoid them.
The taboo of sex in the general environment makes people keep silent and hide their troubles and confusion about sex deeply. "Journal of Sexual Medicine" has published a study, research shows that many women do not tell their partners about the unpleasantness of their sex life.
The problem is covered up, but invisible doesn't mean it doesn't exist, and things will get worse over time.
How to do?
There are many related reasons for the above problems, such as psychology, education, age, medical treatment (surgery, radiotherapy and chemotherapy, drugs), hormone levels, gynecological and urological diseases, etc.
One or two occasional or mild cases can be solved by relaxing your body and mind to free yourself from tension and having good communication with your partner. If the problem is really difficult, what should you do? (The microphone is raised to the audience)
beg! help! Specialize! industry! people! scholar!
(Well~ everyone answered very well~)
The professionals you can turn to are doctors.
To solve problems, we need to talk about methods, and to treat diseases also need symptomatic treatment. There are so many factors that cause abnormalities in the body. Naturally, doctors need to help patients find the root cause and further treatment, such as medication and surgery.
Common drugs are as follows: (The specific drug name is not provided, please follow the doctor's prescription after diagnosis)
External use
Mainly to increase local blood flow, relax smooth muscle, and promote congestion and moisturization of the external genitalia. Commonly used drugs are prostaglandin E1 agonists, etc., and the effect is better for men.
Of course, oral phosphodiesterase-5 inhibitors are the preferred option in the treatment of male boron dysfunction.
central nervous system
By stimulating neurotransmitter receptors, it can improve the sexual excitation of the cerebral cortex and hypothalamus, thereby promoting the smooth progress of sexual life. It is mainly a dopamine agonist drug, which is better for women.
sex hormone drugs
Androgens, estrogen and progesterone can all increase the level of sexual arousal in the genitals.
Antidepressants
The main principle is also to increase the production of dopamine and increase the excitement.
Of course, some problems cannot be solved simply by improving the physiological state. At this time, the help of sexual therapy may be needed.
sex therapy
Sex therapy may be unfamiliar to many of us, and the shyness to talk about sex makes this kind of work mysterious and dark.
Sex therapy has been seen in ancient India, China, Greece, Rome and other places since ancient times. It was not until the 1970s and 1980s that sex therapy had standardized procedures and began to be medicalized. Sex therapists are generally registered physicians or psychologists, and they are professionally trained and certified.
The mother of the male protagonist Otis in "Sex Study Room" is a sex therapist
Sex therapy isn't as unspeakable or overwhelming as some might think, and while it's related to sex, sex therapists all share the principle that they will never have any form of sexual contact with their patients. It is not very different from other forms of psychotherapy and is designed to help individuals or partners resolve sexual problems and have a comfortable and enjoyable relationship and sex life.
Sex therapy is confidential throughout the process. Common methods are the use of psychological interventions and talk (alone or with a partner) therapy. Through effective discussion, the therapist will make recommendations based on specific reasons, and sometimes arrange some for both partners to try. Homework to aid therapy.
So, what specific problems can sex therapists help their patients with?
personal problem
For example, escaping the shadows and painful memories of sexual trauma or sexual assault; treating sexual addiction, hypersexuality, frigidity, and other issues directly related to sexual desire; will also help.
partner problem
For example, the sexual needs of both partners do not match, and there are problems in marriage and sexual relations that arise after one of the partners cheats.
Don Juan's girlfriend Barbara can't accept the fact that Don Juan is watching porn behind his back
Dr. Krychman, a well-known sexual health expert, said that formal sex therapy will help both partners to better understand each other's sexual needs and desires, and are more willing to explore the relationship between the sexes, thereby enhancing sexual and emotional communication.
There are many benefits, but the key to getting effective help is not only your willingness to cooperate, but also a reliable therapist.
In foreign countries, sex therapists are common, but in China, sex therapists can only be regarded as a new profession, and most of the practitioners are nurses. At present, the sex therapists in mainland China mainly come from large hospitals. If you need help in this regard, you can boldly consult the local large general hospitals whether they provide sex therapy services.
Sex therapists are hard to find, and similar reliable psychiatrists are not easy to find. Psychological counseling is a very professional job that requires not only professional knowledge and qualifications, but also a healthy personality.
However, many people in China have started to engage in this industry as soon as they got the counselor certificate. Even if they have the original psychological counselor certificate, it can only mean that they have passed the exam and have not received complete and systematic professional training. Ability to engage in psychological counseling.
In addition, there are not many ways to find qualified psychologists in China, mainly including mental health centers in various regions, clinical psychology departments of hospitals, psychological counseling centers of various universities, and psychological counseling institutions in the society.
The information searched on the Internet is confusing, and it is difficult to distinguish between true and false. A qualified psychiatrist will inform you about his academic qualifications, professional training background, professional qualifications, and charging standards. If he does not mention any of these information, then it is best not to take risks.
When you meet an unreliable consultant, the consequences may be very dangerous. You think you can get rid of the knot, but you get deeper and deeper and even pay the price of your life. This is something no one wants to see. Therefore, it is recommended that you seek help Don’t just choose at random just because you are impatient. Usually, you are entangled between the ordinary number and the expert number when you see a doctor. People who choose to heal their own souls should not be careless either.
