1. 深呼吸,为自己争取时间(breathe and buy yourself time):
要你在这个紧张的时刻深呼吸,听起来似乎有点荒谬,但其实深呼吸能让焦虑的情绪平静下来,为自己争取一点时间,快速地组织思绪,因此在深呼吸的同时,你可以这么说:
▶ That’s an interesting question/idea/thought. Would you mind giving me just a second to think about it?
▶ 这是一个有趣的问题∕构想∕想法,您介意给我一点时间思考一下吗?
2. 先说目标或目的(lead with your endpoint):
当你要沟通的对象是个急性子的人,简明扼要且清楚地说出你的想法是很重要的,最好的方式就是一开始先说出重点,也就是该次沟通的主要目标或目的。举例来说,
▶ Make the dough with water and flour. Then, make the pizza sauce. The next step is to cut up all the vegetables and get your cheese ready. Finally, roll out the dough, put all your toppings on and put the pizza in the oven.
▶ 用水和面粉做成面团,然后做披萨酱,下一个步骤是切好所有的蔬菜,准备好起司,最后擀面团、把所有配料放在披萨上面。
▶ There are 4 simple steps to make a good pizza. Step 1….Step 2…Step 3….Step 4….
▶ 要做好吃的披萨有四个简单的步骤,步骤一…步骤二…步骤三…步骤四...
同样在表达如何做披萨,第二种方式在开头就先说出目的,让对方清楚地了解你接下来要说的事情,如此一来,可避免让对方失去耐心的情形发生。
3. 善用文字叙述(embrace the power of writing):
当你感到特别焦虑,或是还没信心能清楚地用口语表达想法,而情况也许可的时候(例如你的上司并不需要马上得到你的回答),你可以要求用文字来做表达,下面是个简单的方式:
▶ I’d love to give you a clear picture and explain my thoughts in detail. Do you mind if I do that in writing and get back to you by email this afternoon?
▶ 我想给您一个清楚的概念,并详细地解释我的想法,您介意我用书面的形式这样做,在下午以电邮方式回覆您吗?
4. 厘清问题所在(ask clarifying questions):
根据你的理解复述对方所说的内容,并询问你的理解是否正确,这可显示你是个积极的受话者,试图理解对方所说的话,这样可预防误会的产生。你可以这么说:
▶ Just to clarify, you are asking me to…
▶ 确认一下,您是要我⋯⋯
▶ I’d like to make sure that I understand you clearly. You said…
▶ 我想要确认我清楚地明白您说的,您是说⋯⋯
▶ I’d like to go back to something you said a moment ago. Could you explain what you meant by…
▶ 我想回到您刚所说的,可以请您解释一下⋯⋯
5. 正面解决问题(address the issue):
如果上述的方法都不管用,你仍觉得与上司在沟通上备感压力,你可以用简短的电邮向上司提出面谈的机会来解决这个问题。你可以这样写:
▶ I’ve noticed some difficulty in communicating my thoughts clearly. Would you mind sparing a few minutes to meet with me and help me understand how I can best communicate my thoughts to you?
▶ 我留意到要清楚地传达我的想法有些困难,您介意花一点时间和我谈一谈,并帮助我如何有效地与您沟通我的想法吗?
如果你的上司对你交的报告、计画重复地修改,这其中可能有些误解,造成双方的挫折感,在电邮中你可以这样表示:
▶ I’ve reviewed your changes and suggestions. To ensure that this project moves forward smoothly, would you mind taking a few minutes to meet with me and share your expectations?
▶ 我已经看了您的修改和建议,为了确保这个专案能顺利进行,您介意花几分钟的时间和我面谈,并让我知道您的期待吗?
希望透过今天的练习能让大家在职场上面对急性子的上司时,能不疾不徐并且有效地做沟通,我们下次再见!