说起萧伯纳 George Bernard Shaw，不少人都知道他是一位获得过诺贝尔文学奖的杰出剧作家，其实，他也是世界著名的幽默和讽刺大师。
萧伯纳毕生创造幽默，写下了《圣女贞德》(Saint Joan)、《伤心之家》(Heartbreak House)、《华伦夫人的职业》(Mrs. Warren's Profession) 等50余部作品。
在去世前，他把最后的幽默留给了自己，他的墓志铭这样写道:
I knew if I stayed around long enough, something like this would happen.
我早就知道无论我能活多久，这种事情迟早会发生的。
他还制造了一大波扎心的"毒鸡汤"语录，放到当代，绝对是刷爆朋友圈的网红段子，今天，就一起来领教一下他的"毒舌"功力吧！
Lack of money is the root of all evil.缺钱是万恶之源。
Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it. 自由意味著责任，正因为如此，多数人都惧怕自由。
The wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise.明白人从不结婚，结了婚就不明白了。
There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it. 人生有两出悲剧: 一是万念俱灰；另一是踌躇满志。
Your future depends on your dreams. So go to sleep. 未来取决于梦想，所以赶紧睡觉去。
There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning. 开始新的一天，应该有比每天早上一觉醒来更好的方式。
"Work fascinates me", I can look at it for hours. "工作令我着迷"，我可以一看好几个小时。
God made relatives; Thank god we can choose our friends. 上帝造就了亲戚；感谢上帝给了我们选择朋友的机会。
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.每个成功男人的背后，都有一个女人；而每个不成功男人的背后，有两个。
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for? 有人说我们来到这个世上就是要帮助别人的，倘若此话非虚，那么请问，别人来到这个世界又是干什么的？
Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak. 由于光速比音速快，所以在我们听到人们开口之前，个个都显得很聪明。
Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life. 每一个人都应该结婚。毕竟，幸福不是人生中唯一的东西。
There is no sincerer love than the love of food. 没有比热爱饮食更真诚的爱。
As you know, human beings are always overestimate the value of what they do not. 你可知道，人类老是高估了自己所没有的东西的价值。
Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections, and conceal your own. 诸般美德首选沉默，它能让你窥见他人的缺点，同时掩藏自己的不足。
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. 生活不是寻找你自己，而是创造你自己。
He who has never hoped can never despair. 从来没有抱什么希望的人也永远不会失望。
Being silent is the perfect way to show contempt. 沉默是表示轻蔑的最完美方式。
People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the burdens are attached to them.人们估量肩上的担子有时重于担子的本身。
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man. 理性的人让自己适应世界；非理性的人坚持让世界适应自己。因此，所有的进步都依赖于非理性的人。
干了这碗名家出品的"毒鸡汤"，瞬间神清气爽有木有？其中的这几个英文单词，你记住了吗？
Evil [ˈi:vl] – 罪恶，邪恶
Dread [dred] – 恐惧，害怕
Tragedy [ˈtrædʒədi] – 悲剧
Desire [dɪˈzaɪə(r)] – 渴望，希望
Fascinate [ˈfæsɪneɪt] – 着迷
Relative [ˈrelətɪv] – 相关的，亲戚
Bright [braɪt] – 明亮的，聪明的
Happiness ['hæpɪnəs] – 幸福，快乐
Sincerer [sɪn'sɪə(r)] – 更真诚的，这是比较级，原型是: sincere
Overestimate [ˌəʊvərˈestɪmeɪt] – 高估
Virtue [ˈvɜ:tʃu:] – 美德
Despair [dɪˈspeə(r)] – 失望，绝望
Contempt [kənˈtempt] – 轻蔑，轻视
Attach [əˈtætʃ] – 附着，贴上
Reasonable [ˈri:znəbl] – 理性的，合理的
