在史前时代，人类过着悠闲的生活，每周只需工作15-20个小时，狩猎和采集食物，至少人类学家是这么告诉我们的。现在情况早已大不相同。人们每周至少工作40个小时，有时甚至是80个小时。许多人的工作枯燥又有压力，他们认真考虑着要不要跳槽。但是换成什么工作才好呢？下面是市场上最古怪的一些工作，可供你参考。
Armpit Sniffer 闻臭师
only those with the most sensitive schnoz can perform this job. Armpit sniffers is just one category within this highly specialized field that includes professionals that can determine the effectiveness of paper towels, halitosis, feet (insoles), cat litter, and diapers. Armpit sniffers work for deodorant companies. They may spend their days in a hot room sniffing up to 60 armpits an hour to determine the effectiveness of deodorant in controlling sweaty smells and then write up reports on the effectiveness of the different deodorants involved. The work requires both a good sense of smell and a willingness to smell someone else's sweaty body. Salaries range from $19,000 to $52,000 a year, varying with experience and seniority.
这项工作只有那些嗅觉非常灵敏的人才能胜任。腋窝嗅探师只是这个高度专业化领域中的一部分，气味鉴定员包括能够鉴别纸巾、口臭、脚臭（或鞋垫）、猫砂以及尿布等的专业人员。腋窝嗅探师为除臭剂公司工作。他们要在一个炎热的房间里呆上好几天，每小时要闻最多60个腋窝，以确定除臭剂在控制汗味方面的有效性，此外还要为不同的除臭剂撰写报告。这份工作既要有良好的嗅觉，还需要甘愿闻臭的精神。他们的年薪从1.9万美元（约合人民币13.5万元）到5.2万美元不等，视经验和资历而定。
halitosis['hælə'tosɪs]: n. 口臭
Golf Ball Diver 高尔夫球潜水员
Have you ever wondered what happens to all those golf balls that end up in the ponds, lakes and streams? They’re not left in the water to rot for all eternity. Instead, golf ball divers retrieve them and make a handsome profit from them. Before you sneer, read this: a typical golf ball diver can retrieve 800,000 balls a year, or 40 tons, and make up to $100,000. The downside is that there are many dangers involved, including drowning accidents and alligator attacks (no kidding!), and several deaths have been reported.
高尔夫球要是滚进了池塘、湖泊或小溪里会怎么样？它们不会永远留在水底，直至腐烂。相反，高尔夫球潜水员会把它们都找回来，并从中获得可观的收入。可别小看这个工作。一个专业的高尔夫球潜水员一年可以捡到80万个球（约40吨），最多可以赚到10万美元。不过这项工作也有危险，比如发生溺水事故或遭到鳄鱼袭击，这可不是开玩笑的！过去曾报道过数起这类死亡事件。
Chicken Sexer 小鸡性别鉴定员
Tons of chickens are born on chicken farms every day and they need to be sorted according to their sex; as females are meant for egg-laying while males provide the meat. The chicken sexer determines the animals' sex using two techniques. The first one is known as feather sexing; this is when the chicks are specially bred to produce feathers that look different on males and females. Vent sexing, on the other hand, is more hands-on; in this method, you literally squeeze the poop out of the chicks in order to see inside their intestines, where you look for their sex organs; once you identify out the chicks’ sex, you separate them and move them on to their next destinations. The job requires two to three years of training, long hours standing and concentration, a gentle hand and a good eye. Salaries vary, but for US and European standards, the pay is not so hot, around $20,000 in the US and £15,000 in the UK, although in other countries like Brazil it is considered a great job with experienced sexers making $1,200 a month.
养鸡场里每天都有大量的鸡仔出生，它们需要根据性别进行分类，因为雌性是用来下蛋的，雄性是用来吃的。性别鉴定员通过两种技术来确定鸡的性别。一种是通过羽毛鉴定，雌性和雄性小鸡生出来的时候，羽毛看起来是不同的。另一种更实际的方法是肛门鉴定法。将小鸡的粪便挤出来之后，就能看到它们的性器官。一旦你确定了小鸡的性别，就将它们分开运往不同的目的地。这项工作需要受两到三年的训练，要能长时间保持站立和集中注意力，此外还要有一双温柔的手和好眼力。尽管各地薪资不同，但从欧美标准来看，这项工作并不是很热门。在美国年薪约为2万美元，英国则为1.5万英镑。但在巴西等其他国家，人们认为这是一份很棒的工作，有经验的性别鉴定者每月能挣1200美元。
hands-on[,hændz'ɑn]: adj. 亲身实践的，亲自动手的
Pet Food Taster 宠物食品品尝师
Pet food tasters evaluate the nutritional value of pet food and, yes, taste-test it to ensure your canine’s meal is flavorful, immune boosting and chock-full-of vitamins and minerals. Smell is also important when choosing the best options. No homeowner wants a house that stinks of fish. They don’t spend every day sampling a cuisine fit for a pampered pooch, though like professional wine tasters, pet food testers spit it out instead of swallowing it. Most days, they’re writing reports and thinking up new ideas on how to put a nutritional spin on a new line of food. Salaries in the US range from $34,000 – $117,000, and, of course, you’re guaranteed strong teeth.
宠物食品品尝师会评估宠物食品的营养价值，同时还会进行口味测试，以确保宠物食品味道鲜美、富含维生素和矿物质、能够增强免疫力。宠物食品的气味也很重要，没有哪个主人会选择散发着浓重鱼腥味的食物。品尝师并不是每天都在花时间品尝适合宠物享用的美食。和专业的品酒师一样，他们嚼一嚼之后就会吐出来，不会吞下去。多数时候，品尝师们都在写报告，绞尽脑汁地思考如何在新食品中增添营养成分。美国宠物食品品尝师的年薪从3.4万美元到11.7万美元不等。当然，你必须要有一口坚硬的牙齿。
pampered: adj. 饮食过量的；饮食奢侈的
Turd Burner 粪便燃烧处理师
For those who spend long periods of time in the great outdoors or at sea, relieving yourself can be more problematic than you think as operating toilets are not always feasible or readily available. So what to do with all the human waste? Several companies have come up with special toilets that burn excrement for such occasions. But, of course, someone has to operate these ingenious contraptions, turd burners. Although the “flushing” is done by each visitor to the john, these workers maintain and operate special toilets that burn waste so it’s converted into harmless, germ-free, odorless ashes. But they’ve got to use their nose to tell if something’s wrong with the toilet. If there’s a bad smell, something’s wrong.
对于那些长时间待在户外或在海上的人来说，上厕所麻烦得很，厕所不一定能用，有时还没有厕所。那么应该如何处理排泄物呢？有几家公司发明了一种特殊的厕所，能够燃烧粪便。虽然上完厕所的人都会冲水，但必须要有专业人士来操纵这一装置，使粪便转化为无害、无味、无菌的灰烬。他们必须用鼻子来辨别装置是否出了问题，如果有难闻的味道，那必定是出了故障。
turd[tɝd]: n. 粪，粪便
Gum Buster 口香糖克星
We all did it willfully when we were kids, and still do it unwittingly as adults: Stick your used, chewed-up, salivated gum onto a surface, any surface. But sooner or later, someone’s going to have to clean that up. That’s when a Gum Buster goes to work. They clean gum off of city sidewalks, stadium seats, school hallways, and the underside of school desks. The name “Gum Buster” comes from the machine you use, invented by a Dutch chemist in 1998. The machine dry steams the gum in just 5 seconds, making removal easier. Gum Busters can expect to earn between $18,000 – $40,000.
从小到大，我们都会故意或不经意地把吃过的、嚼过的、沾满唾液的口香糖黏在各种表面。总有一天会有人来收拾残局。这就是口香糖克星的职责所在，他们会清理掉城市人行道、体育场座位、学校走廊和课桌底部的口香糖。1998年，一位荷兰的化学家发明了一台专治口香糖的机器，只需要5秒就能蒸干口香糖，这样就方便清理了。口香糖克星的名字就源于这台机器。口香糖克星的年薪预计在1.8万至4万美元之间。
Whale-Feces Researcher 鲸鱼粪便研究员
When whales poo, they poo bigtime, almost as large as the whale itself. Researchers comb through giant logs of whale dung looking for clues about the endangered North Atlantic right whales, including pregnancy detection, genetics, hormone and biotoxin levels. Whale poo chasers first have to find a pod, and wait for them to relieve themselves. They have about an hour before the turds sink to the bottom of the ocean.
鲸鱼的粪便几乎和它们的个头一般大。为了研究濒临灭绝的北大西洋露脊鲸，研究人员需要梳理大量的鲸鱼粪便，探寻怀孕指征、遗传、激素和生物毒素水平等线索。研究员们首先要找到一个鲸群，然后等着他们排便。他们大约只有一个小时的时间，否则粪便很快就会沉入海底。
